Take Me Back to Chicago
Installment #4
Today, I was traded.
At classes like the one I'm attending, we are often placed in teams around tables. As a team, we study scenarios, solve challenges, and generally compete against the other tables.
This morning, as we took our customary places, the instructor informed us that they were going to make a few "Changes".
As soon as she said that, I began to gather up my stuff.
You see, I have been to 3 different classes in the past three months. At each one of them, they have asked just a couple of people to change tables halfway through the week.
Out of Three classes, I have been the one "traded" Three times. This would make it four for four.
Sure enough, she called my name. I grabbed my gear and headed to another table.
Why me?
I'd like to think that the authorities constantly trade me so that I might share my incredible knowledge and charm with as many people in the class as possible.
I'd also like to think I can still sing Karaoke.
In February, 1987, the Minnesota Twins backed a truck up to Olympic Stadium in Montreal, dumped a load of compost on the Expo's lawn, and walked away with relief Pitcher Jeff Reardon. The Twins went on to win the world series.
It was a trade specifically designed to make the Twins better.
8 Years later, the Minnesota Vikings Traded Randy Moss to the Oakland Raiders for compost of slightly lesser value.
It was regarded by many as a trade specifically designed to get rid of a jerk.
My new team is made up entirely of women. They are VERY proud of this. They had even named themselves "The Empowered Misses".
But they made an accommodation for me...
In case you can't read it, their team sign now reads, "Empowered Misses...plus Him".
Just call me number 84...
Today, I was traded.
At classes like the one I'm attending, we are often placed in teams around tables. As a team, we study scenarios, solve challenges, and generally compete against the other tables.
This morning, as we took our customary places, the instructor informed us that they were going to make a few "Changes".
As soon as she said that, I began to gather up my stuff.
You see, I have been to 3 different classes in the past three months. At each one of them, they have asked just a couple of people to change tables halfway through the week.
Out of Three classes, I have been the one "traded" Three times. This would make it four for four.
Sure enough, she called my name. I grabbed my gear and headed to another table.
Why me?
I'd like to think that the authorities constantly trade me so that I might share my incredible knowledge and charm with as many people in the class as possible.
I'd also like to think I can still sing Karaoke.
In February, 1987, the Minnesota Twins backed a truck up to Olympic Stadium in Montreal, dumped a load of compost on the Expo's lawn, and walked away with relief Pitcher Jeff Reardon. The Twins went on to win the world series.
It was a trade specifically designed to make the Twins better.
8 Years later, the Minnesota Vikings Traded Randy Moss to the Oakland Raiders for compost of slightly lesser value.
It was regarded by many as a trade specifically designed to get rid of a jerk.
My new team is made up entirely of women. They are VERY proud of this. They had even named themselves "The Empowered Misses".
But they made an accommodation for me...
In case you can't read it, their team sign now reads, "Empowered Misses...plus Him".
Just call me number 84...
posted by Colonel Havoc at 6:25 PM
3 Comments:
It was regarded by many as a trade specifically designed to get rid of a jerk.
I'm not saying that, Reinman. It's just some people, y'know.
Man, I wish we still had Moss.
With Moss, a mediocre season was frustrating, but at least he still provided lots of entertainment.
"That's a big fine, Randy. How're you gonna pay it?"
"Straight cash, homie!"
Without Moss, a mediocre season is frustrating and boring.
If you scroll fast, the guy with the beard kinda looks like Dave Popelik.
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