Friday, June 23, 2006

But Seriously, Folks

With a fishing trip (see John 21) approaching, and the inevitable, sleep-depriving snoring that accompanies such a group venture, the Colonel decided it was time to finally load up the IPOD so graciously procured for him by the Director.

One of the last CD's to to fit in the 1GB memory was an old favorite...



I hadn't listened to this album for about 6 years, but it still carries very special meaning.

One song in particular, "William & Maggie" had been instrumental during a major life change for the Colonel & family way back then.

Naturally, it was the first track I had to play...

Now, I'm not a big fan of just pasting lyrics on the Band Blog, but I take some solace in the fact that because I couldn't find them anywhere on the net, I had to keep playing the song over and over to type them here.


In fact, I had to keep working at it so long that I finally stopped weeping.

So I post Charlie Peacock's "William & Maggie" here to give you a rare, if somewhat cryptic insight into what makes the Colonel and the Blond tick...

"William & Maggie" by Charlie Peacock

William for whom the world was given
Dared not disturb the sleep of friends
But one time in the night
He turned to his wife
And he whispered, "Remember..."
"When I was young, and you were Maggie"

'Cause I've been thinking about
You and me and everybody in between
It seems
We've suffered one too many dreams
Of things that weren't so bad
It's just
They were little things that we could trust
Are we
Still pretending very much?

Maggie by whom all hearts are measured
Kissed William softly on the cheek and said,
"Oh it always amazed me
How someone could come
To the edge of the world
Drop a stone down the side
Then turn and return
To the very same life I remember
When I was young and you were William"

'Cause I've been thinking about
You and me and everybody in between
It seems
We've suffered one too many dreams
Of things that weren't so bad
It's just
They were little things that we could trust
We must
Stop pretending very much

What are the interval moments
When you feel nothing
And I feel nothing
Maggie, I'm trembling in this
Interval moment
When you feel nothing
And I feel nothing

Maggie by whom all hearts are measured
Kissed William softly on the cheek and said,
"Sometimes William,
William sometimes,
You've gotta open up the window...
And let the wind blow through"

You've got to
Let it blow through
You and me and everybody in between
It seems
We've suffered one too many dreams
Of things that weren't so bad
It's just
They were little things that we could trust
We will
Release them as they turn to dust

'Cause I've been thinking about
You and me and everybody in between
It seems
We've suffered one too many dreams
Of things that weren't so bad
It's just
They were little things that we could trust
Are we
Still pretending very much?


Thanks to both of my readers for letting me share that.
You can find & download the song if you'd like, it's better with the music.


Next time, we return to silly observations and the Colonel's Dumb Dog.

Friday, June 16, 2006

Instructions...Part 2

It was a very hot and humid day. Lil' Penny wanted a Lil' Backyard Pool, so the Blond went to Lil' Wal-Mart to get one.

They really didn't have any small,
Kiddie-Type pools (for our 15 year old) so she ended up getting the smallest, most reasonably priced, soft sided, above ground pool she could find.



Since these pools have a small filter and other accessories, we quickly discovered that we had to actually MAINTAIN the pool. We overheard cryptic conversations in the pool aisle at Wal-mart, like one woman saying to another...

"Yes, yes, you can have the right level of Bromine, but you just HAVE to keep that PH Balanced."

Uh-oh...

Test Strips, PH, Alkalines, Bromine, Chlorine, Algae Control, Balancers, and (I swear I am not making this up)..."
Shock Treatment".

I had a steep learning curve ahead of me, and it was in the shape of a blue, slightly out-of-round bag of festering water in my backyard.

Internet to the rescue... I read a couple of good articles from people who had scaled this wall of pool maintenance before me. One article stated that the best way to tackle the whole "Chlorine Problem" was to get one of those dispensers that automatically dissolves a little tablet of sanitizer as it floats around in the pool.

So back to Wal-Mart, and here's where the instructions come in. The directions for using the Floating Chlorine Dispenser consisted of a single, two-sided piece of paper...



The front page told me, in no uncertain terms, of the SEVERE DANGER (Peligro) to myself and my progeny if I DARED to violate the detailed information promised on the other side of these orders. "SAVE THESE INSTRUCTIONS or you will DIE!" was the clear implication.

With great trepidation, I turned the paper over...



"Clic".

There's that word again. What is it about instructions where the ONLY THING they think I need to know is this magical word, "Clic"?

In a cost saving measure, they even decided to omit the letter "k".

Click. Once again, that was it... "Click."

Somewhere, on the original pool box, there is a support number listed.

"Click." I'd call the number, but I'm deathly afraid I'll get the same response.