Tuesday, August 18, 2009


"Hey, where IS everybody? What's going on?"
"Gee, I dunno, Dad. Do you think it might have something to do with the TORNADOES bearing down on us?"
Thus began our 20 minute trip out to our favorite beach.
Allow me to backtrack...
The Colonel and the Blond, feeling somewhat giddy/melancholy over the prospect of everyone leaving again, decided to abduct the two youngest spawn and ferret them away to the local state park for a final swim-n-grill session. Urgent, almost pleading cries from the local weather channel were ignored and we set out for our destination.
Entering McCarthy Beach State Park (Googlers: Ha Ha! That's why you ended up here!) we encountered a phenomenon we have never before seen - a completely empty parking lot.
Seriously. One red Vibe (ours) - No one else. (Hint #1.)
Ignoring the pitch-black clouds (Hint#2), we stubbornly began emptying the hatchback of chairs, blankets, grilling tools, coolers, and a large rubber floatie.
"Uh-oh," Said the Colonel, "I forgot the anchor for the raft."
He gazed out oat the four-foot whitecaps rolling in. (Hint #3)
"Maybe we can just pull it out and let the waves push us back in."
The Blond, who possesses significantly less Moron Tendencies than the Colonel, glanced out at the tsunami.
"We're not going to do that."
The raft stayed in the car.
Next Dilemma: How to keep a tiny Coleman Grill lit in 80mph gusts of wind.
1. Raw Polish
2. (Moron kicking in...) Cover the Burning Grill with a Beach Blanket.
Blond: "Should we just go to a restaurant?"
Colonel: "Anchor the corner of that blanket down with that propane bottle, would ya?"
This is true: At one point, the LIT grill actually blew off the picnic table. The Colonel alertly caught it and returned it to cooking position, Fraboni Polish intact.
All in all, it was kind of fun, in a stupid sort of way.
The Blond found a Big Piece-o-Driftwood tm.
We had Ice Cream...
...and our Beach Blanket smells like Polish Sausage.