The EETs of San Francisco

First Night: Clam Chowder at Alioto's. Quote the Blond, "It ain't from a can!"
We found this guy on Pier 39.
The Colonel was pretty excited about the French combo meal.
"I'll have the Crepe, FRIGHTS, and a Soda, please!" He gleefully announced. Later, the Blond quietly hissed, "It's pronounced FREET, moron."
After eating too many "freet", the Blond insisted we get some fresh fruit.
She chose well.

The Colonel, on the other hand, preferred a place called "Chocolate Heaven."

It was.The Blond did get into the Chocolate Groove at Ghiradelli. After picking out a pretty nifty chocolate-filled cable car, she sent the me up to the counter to pay for it.

The Colonel noticed a 10% off coupon sitting by the cash register. A normal human would recognise that a previous customer had just used it, but being a Moron, I scooped it up.

"Hey!" can I use this?" I gushed.

The clerk regarded me much the way a potato would.

"Is it yours?"

"Well...yeah. I just FOUND IT!"She grumbled something unintelligible and rang up the discount.With all this food, it is fortunate that the California Euphorians have placed these ECO-FRIENDLY, self-cleaning (really) facilities almost EVERYWHERE. Of course, they have a plethora of Silly, Big-Government Rules and Policies, like "Only One Adult Allowed in at a Time."

Now, the self-cleaning idea might seem pretty cool, but in fact it's kind of gross.

Then again, what kind of idiot would actually video the inside of one of these things? This is true: The video ends abruptly, because as I activated the automatic door, there was a very large man waiting outside with a "What the heck are you doing?" scowl on his face.

Unfortunately, when I REALLY needed one of these facilities, there wasn't one to be seen.

Most businesses on Fisherman's Wharf have signs that say their version of "Rest Rooms are for Customers, Only!"

One very inhospitable place in particular actually made you get a token from the front counter. This establishment happened to be the only one within striking distance when my moment of need arrived.

So I had to buy a Cheeseburger.

We made up for that Faux Pas by having breakfast at a more reputable site.Wednesday Night: Cioppino's. (Think Valentini's on Steroids, but not in a good way...)Out on the Bus Tour, we encountered "The French Laundry." Apparently, this is the "Best Restaurant in the World." Seriously. Reservations are only available MONTHS in advance, and even then they are hard to get. There is a person on ebay who gets reservations and then sells them for $200.00. No food, just the reservation. The food runs about $500-$700 per meal.The tour guide must have not realized that we wanted to eat there, because he just drove right on by, and we had to settle for snapping this picture. We had a nice picnic instead.

Final night...out of money...corn dogs.