I Didn't Go To The Dells To Get Wet

OK, one more pointless recap of our endless summer, and then we will return to the Band Blog's normal foolishness.

On our trip to Wisconsin Dells, (Motto: Even our police station has a water slide!) We decided one evening to head "Downtown". If you have never been on Broadway in Wisconsin Dells, just imagine the nicest street in the world, with tasteful little shops, staffed by polite, friendly employees who take great delight in interacting with pleasant, sober, and intelligent patrons. Then, imagine that the entire strip was purchased, bulldozed, and rebuilt by Satan.

Let's see... There's Ripley's "Believe it or Not" museum, Tommy Bartlet's GyroTron (Do NOT eat a gyro before riding, although you can purchase one right next door.), 15 places that make "Authentic Swiss Chocolate" right in front of you, seven thousand t-shirt shops, and most importantly, WIZARD QUEST: a place so nerdy that all the guys who camp out to see Star Wars prequels go there to make fun of someone else for a change. Seriously, they should change the name of this place to "Wedgie Quest", 'cause that's what you're looking for if you get caught going in.

So we went downtown to waste a couple hours and a mortgage payment or two. Finally, we found a decent candy kitchen. When we came out, with arms full of delicious, water soluble confectioneries, the rain began.

It was an incredible downpour, and our car was 2 miles away through a swirling purgatory of neon, garbage, and heavy precipitation.

"Quick!" I shouted, holding the Whiner by the ankles so she wouldn't blow away, "Let's gather the entire family under this SIX INCH awning." The awning was over a front window of a Mexican restaurant. Because it really was just half a foot wide, all it did was concentrate the rain from the entire roof onto the tops of our heads. So we just stood there, with our backs to the window, trying desperately to to avoid the deluge.

Finally, the owner tapped on the glass and invited us to come in out of the rain. He was a really nice guy. So we gratefully waited out the rain, and even ordered some food.



All the while, we were marveling at how nice it was for this guy to invite us in like that. It was only later that I realized how we must have looked to his customers, standing outside, soaking wet, with our backs, etc. pressed up against the restaurant window...

"Uh, yeah, I'll have a large burrito, a plate of nacho's, and a large chocolate sha..." (Noticing us outside) "Uh...on second thought, I'm not very hungry right now. Do you have any pepto bismal?"

But whatever his motivation, the owner was a really super guy. The food was good (Especially the house salsa) and if you are ever in Wisconsin Dells, we strongly recommend you eat at the Colotlan Mexican Restaurant down at the end of Broadway.

You can skip "Wizard Quest."