Because it's Good to Post...
On Monday, before our softball game, I thought I'd whip up a quick supper for the Blond. After all, she works at a Veterinary Clinic all day, and comes home tired, hungry, and smelling like cat food,(Awful smell,...cat food) while I post stupid stories on the Net and then run off to play Adult Male Life-Sports, so I figure it was the least I could do.
So I threw together a small bowl of greens, and thought I'd mix up some tuna for sandwiches. As I opened the can, I was kind of in a hurry to get to the game. I was already in uniform and ready to go. If I could just squeeeeeeeze out this last bit of tuna water (NOBODY likes a soggy TFS) I could get on my way.
Taking the can in my hands, I pushed my thumbs real hard in the center...
Just a little more...
Just a little more...
Suddenly, the top of the can bent in half. The tuna and water shot out and hit me in the stomach, exploding like a paintball (Obvious link, so just skip it...) on impact.
"Aaaauuuuggh!" I paraphrased...
The dog loved it, but I was a mess. I felt a team obligation to still wear my jersey, so I cleaned up as best I could and set out for the game.
It was a very warm night for a double header.
After a while I began to feel more unpopular than usual. Guys started sliding down the bench, further and further away. Eventually, they all went and sat in the other team's dugout.
The first thing the Blond said when she saw me was, "You smell like cat food."
So I threw together a small bowl of greens, and thought I'd mix up some tuna for sandwiches. As I opened the can, I was kind of in a hurry to get to the game. I was already in uniform and ready to go. If I could just squeeeeeeeze out this last bit of tuna water (NOBODY likes a soggy TFS) I could get on my way.
Taking the can in my hands, I pushed my thumbs real hard in the center...
Just a little more...
Just a little more...
Suddenly, the top of the can bent in half. The tuna and water shot out and hit me in the stomach, exploding like a paintball (Obvious link, so just skip it...) on impact.
"Aaaauuuuggh!" I paraphrased...
The dog loved it, but I was a mess. I felt a team obligation to still wear my jersey, so I cleaned up as best I could and set out for the game.
It was a very warm night for a double header.
After a while I began to feel more unpopular than usual. Guys started sliding down the bench, further and further away. Eventually, they all went and sat in the other team's dugout.
The first thing the Blond said when she saw me was, "You smell like cat food."
posted by Colonel Havoc at 8:35 AM
5 Comments:
Hey I noticed the small stain on the jersey sorry to slink away like I did. . . perhaps the smell of cat food scared David away. Anywho, thanks for the seeds David.
How ironic! At least Gina got a treat.
I get the same response when I wear my "Smells Like Crap" deoderant. Hmm, strange.
HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA! You n ever cease to make me laugh! Ha!
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