Things I Never Thought I'd Say

Recently, the Blond and the Colonel have been on a bit of a special diet.  In all candor, it’s been a 50/50, Deep Spiritual Adventure/Totally Self-Absorbed Vanity, kind of thing for us. 

But in the midst of growing closer to God and dropping a couple pounds, I have also had the added benefit of hearing phrases come out of my mouth that I have never heard before.  I seriously thought I would have happily died without ever having uttered these exact words in these combinations. (See: “Let’s go to Mall of America” for reference)

Here are the top five:

5.  “No coffee for me, thanks.”

4.  “They didn’t have enough of the vegan veggie burgers, so I had to get something else.”

3.   “Mmmm, this applesauce is good!”

2.  “Hold on, I need to refill my water bottle.”

And the #1 phrase I never thought I would say:

“We need to buy more Bananas.”

Help me.